So colour me surprised when I received an email from Facebook today, telling me that it was great that I’d done something with my account. I didn’t. I wouldn’t. But since I was now stuck wondering if someone had hacked in to my account on that shitshow, I now had to just to change my password again. Awesome. This is just goddamn awesome. Begin rage!

I couldn’t even remember my password, so I had to reset it. And that brought my account back to life (again, apparently) like a hideous monster that needs a clip of silver bullets emptied in to it’s face. I don’t even care if it dies, I just want it scarred and savaged and left screaming in a field somewhere.

Page after page of stupid “Here’s what’s different!” garbage before I can finally access my account options. And I go to deactivate (AGAIN!)

I am now shown a screen of a bunch of pictures of people still linked as Friends to my account, with messages of how sad they’d be if I left. At this point, the expletives became fully verbal.

If ANYONE who actually knows me is truly saddened at my removing myself (AGAIN!) from this horrible application, I do not wish to remain friends with you in any capacity at all. I want to cause you pain.

And what the Hell is the point of this? Some sort of weird guilt trip? Attention Mark Zuckerberg…guilt trips typically work because they come from a woman that we want to fuck. You aren’t a woman. I do not wish to be inside of you, aside from my fist driving through you when I deliver a vicious body punch. Enough. Just enough.

This angered me to such a ridiculous extent that I went back and removed every single person who still resided on my friends list. Gone. All gone. Who’s gonna miss me now, Facebook? Who you guilt trippin’ me with NOW? Yes indeed, it was war between myself and a ridiculous app.

Now it’s gone again. I am never coming back. I deleted basically every goddamn link to this mess that I could before killing it (AGAIN). Let me delete it, you douchebag whores.

I couldn’t possibly hate Facebook more. It isn’t possible.

UPDATE : Thanks to Liam, I have killed my account. The Earth has been salted. If you wish to do the same, follow one of the sets of instructions here.

Was there some sort of memo that I missed that explained that, if you wish to be someone who enjoys playing games, you also have to be an extremist fuckbag who spends his off time basically assaulting people with a bunch of incorrect nonsense masquerading as factoids?

Every single gaming ‘conversation’ that seems to pop up on any sort of web forum (admittedly, web forums already start off a bit behind the eight ball in that they tend towards being repositories of shit) seems to immediately break down in to partisan warfare. On the one side are the absolutely fanboyz of the game…you could tell these twats that the game’s designer actually raped their mother and they’d defend it as the justified actions of someone who is such a genius that they cannot be constrained by such puny ideas as ‘laws’. On the other side are the people who so vehemently discredit anyone who so much as states that they thought the game was okay that they probably start stabbing anyone they meet who doesn’t start casual conversation with “I so fucking HATE (offending game’s titles here).”

Even worse is what has become DRM ‘discussion’. Christ, I write content for a FUCKING DRM BLOG and I’m sick of this shit because once it comes up, it never goes away. Three years ago, very little conversation about this subject happened…it was like that topic polite people don’t bring up, like taxes or the fact someone’s sister is a whore who just had her third abortion. Now, it drowns out actually talking about the game.

It’s like the instant it’s brought up as a subject, DRM simply as a topic chokes the life from any other conversation that could possibly be had about the goddamn game. You have people who have the slightest glimmer of something resembling a fact spewing out absolute goddamn nonsense at one another as though it’s a rational exchange of something called ‘ideas’. It’s insane! People talking about how Steam ‘eats up a lot of resources’. Really? 15 MB of memory being used is a lot of resources? 1996 called, and it would like its computer back. Or ‘That there StarForce will make your computer come to life and fuck your dog in the ass!’ Yes, that sounds reasonable…and besides, maybe he likes it? And there’s nothing like being told you’re an idiot because you don’t see things like ‘Dumbfuck Jimmy’ sees them, where he equates he and his two friends with the one tooth between them thinking something as meaning that EVERYONE thinks it.

And of course, nobody in ANY of these shoutfests is wrong or mistaken about anything. NOOOOOO! Even if you DO put a fact in their face, once they’re over the shock of being exposed to such a foreign concept, they’ll start rambling about how “Well, it somehow magically broke my son’s computer, so it’s TEH EVIL!” Okay then, genius. Now go grab your helmet and crawl up on to the short bus with all the other mongoloids. Here’s to hoping it spins out on an icy bridge with no guard rails…

I have tried on two occasions to install Comodo’s firewall on my computer. Both times the result has been epic disaster…it stops loading at system start up, can’t be manually started at all, and starts actually blocking a bunch of other software from running. All of this is fixed once it’s removed. Now, does that mean it’s an invasive piece of shit? No, it means that it doesn’t get along with something in my computer setup. Nothing more, nothing less. And because I occasionally resemble a fucking adult, I don’t run around calling it the worst piece of malware of all time.

I love playing games. I love talking about games. Hell, I do like telling people what copy protection a game uses, or what it needs to run, blah blah blah. I guess I’m just looking for some sort of eugenics program, where only those with a working synapse across their brain pan can actually discuss this shit and everyone else is just ‘removed’ until they decide they can play nice, stick to reality and shut their dumb fuck mouths once in awhile.

We now return you to your regularly scheduled…actually, no this is par for the course.

This may be news to you, but when you announce a free game code for anyone with an account, word tends to spread around the Internetz. The result…a LOT of people checking out your site. Perhaps it might be a decent idea to have enough server infrastructure in place to handle the load?

However, that apparently didn’t occur to you. So what most people encountered was a website groaning from the weight of that crush of potential customers, several minute long load times for any page of the site, and frequent time out and 504 errors because the site couldn’t deal with it. This does not engender confidence in your outlet.

Even worse, you didn’t really mention to anyone that there was a timer on the voucher code. Now it’s done, and a LOT of people out there are doubly pissed off at trying to fight through this clusterfuck of a site only to get…nothing! Brilliant. Tell me, did your marketing people actually go to school, or did you just ask some random junior high students what they thought might work and pay them in cheap beer? Whoever they are, the fact that they thought this logo was a good idea in the first place kind of calls their intelligence in to question :

What the Hell is that? Is he not getting enough fibre in his diet? Ironically, this is the one day that the logo fits, because I’d imagine that grimace is indicative of how the average person checking your site out felt today.

We all know that being British means you’re born behind the eight ball when it comes to dental hygiene and decent food…I guess I didn’t realize that it also extended out to cover web design and having a basic clue what in the fuck you’re doing. You brought in more traffic than your site could deal with, resulting in massive slow downs for both new and pre-existing customers. Then you put a timer on the deal without mentioning that little fact. Oh, and you’re footing the bill for any free sales by paying the developers what an actual sale would have brought them. This doesn’t strike me as so much a business plan as the random scribblings of a deranged drunkard on a cocktail napkin after a night of too much gin.

Not exactly a great early step in to the world, boys.

And yeah, I still would have been rather put off if my attempted grab of Theatre of War 2 had actually gone through. The fact that it failed doesn’t help.

Indeed, there do in fact be stupid folk about. And…why the fuck am I talking like a pirate? AAAGH! The stupid! It’s…it’s CATCHING!

Or perhaps I’ve simply had some sort of aneurysm whilst reading about a couple of these particularly genius type folk in the past few days.

Let’s start with Lauren Rosenberg. Lauren lives in Utah. Could I really just pretty much end it right there? Well that would be lazy and wholly unsatisfying, and I do love to talk, so I’ll continue. Lauren was wandering between two addresses in Utah, using Google Maps to get from one to another. The top result she got led her to…a highway. She was hit by a car. She is now suing Google for the fact she’s too fucking stupid to not walk on a highway. This is what this dimwit saw in that whole crazy REAL LIFE thing (with the route transposed on to the shot) :

And yet she went ahead because the magic Google told her to. You want someone to blame, Lauren? May I suggest suing your mother for bringing you to term. You walked along a section of road with no sidewalk and with a noise barrier forcing you closer TO A MAJOR HIGHWAY. And that didn’t strike you as perhaps not a good idea? But no, because this worthless hag can’t possibly be expected to have an ounce of self preservation instinct, it’s now (according to her lawsuit) the fault of Google and the driver who hit her when she crossed a highway in the middle of the night. You know who I think deserves the blame? Charles Darwin. Evolution needs to start trying harder.

Secondly, we come to Junior Tan of Singapore. Apparently he decided that his iPhone needed a much higher cool quotient. But how to make it seem much more awesome than it really is?

Turns out it’s pretty simply really, especially if you’re a creative type like good ol’ Junior is. Using a few household items, this MacGuyver wannabe has crafted a much ‘better’ dock for his iPhone, one that will truly have him feeling sufficiently manly. Care to see it?

I have one hope here. When the inevitable happens, and a cop sees this twat pull out his phone and puts about a dozen holes in him, PLEASE let those godawful sunglasses survive his death. He needs to wear those as he’s lowered in to the Earth, stuck bearing them on his rotting face for all eternity.

How did this EVER seem like a good idea? Why not just wear some sort of actual bullet magnet device and take a stroll through Compton wearing blue AND red attire?

Anyway, Mark has a few thoughts about the idea of building a mosque as part of the re-construction of the area that once housed the World Trade Center. Now, seems to me that’s actually not a shitty idea. Not a bad way for people to come together than to go ahead and build the damn thing there as an indication that everyone isn’t a fucking reactionary who thinks that every muslim wants to blow up white people for shits and giggles. Apparently, Mark feels JUST a bit differently, and wasn’t afraid to say so on his blog.

The terrorists of Islam for whom any day is a great day for a massacre are drooling over the positive response that they are getting from New York City officials over a proposal to build a 13 story monument to the 9/11  Muslim hijackers. Consider it for what it is,  a 13 story tall middle finger being flipped at the victims of 911 and America as a whole by animals.   Ground Zero is the last place that any legitimate religion would ever plant a “cultural center” to advance inter-faith understanding.

Drink in that level of brainy subtlety. Yep, every muslim wants to kill you…fer yer FREEDOMS and such, no doubt. And why is Ground Zero apparently completely off limits to religion? This fucking idiot expects me to believe that if any other religious group wanted to build an edifice there, he’d freak out? Well…okay, so long as they aren’t white, I’m pretty sure he would. Anyway, that bilge is HIS OPENING PARAGRAPH. It actually manages to go downhill from that in to the Valley of Retardation. Let’s just skip to the highlights…

The monument being built would consist of a Mosque for the worship of the terrorists’ go”  and a “cultural center”  to propagandize for the extermination of all things not approved by their cult.

Now, he’s actually since edited this down. It was worse. It was dumber. And the good folks at Gawker grabbed a quote of what WAS there in the first place.

The monument would consist of a Mosque for the worship of the terrorists’ monkey-god (repeat: “the terrorists’ monkey-god.” if you feel that fits a description of Allah then that is your own deep-seated emotional baggage not mine, talk to the terrorists who use Allah as their excuse and the Muslims who apologize for and rationalize them) and a “cultural center” to propagandize for the extermination of all things not approved by their cult. It is a project of American Society for Muslim Advancement and the Cordoba Initiative, essentially the same group of apologists (but under 2 different names) for terrorists and the animals who use it as a terrorist ideology. They cloak their evil with new age gibberish that suggests Islam is just misunderstood.

So…what happened, Mark? I mean, you clearly felt pretty strongly about having this up on your site…so why alter it? Where did the whole ‘Monkey God’ part run away to? It’s pretty evident that you don’t let pesky shit like facts get in the way of your barely legible ramblings about nonsense, so why exactly did your balls run away and take that part of your statements with them?

Perhaps it had something to do with you providing yet ANOTHER example that the Tea Party is a collection of racist fucking retards slamming yet another group of brown people? Could that perhaps have a little something to do with it? Oh, they’re back-pedaling…they’re desperately trying to run away from your statements as quickly as possible, saying they aren’t affiliated with those statements. Trouble is, YOU’RE THE FUCKING CHAIRMAN. So they’re escaping about as effectively as that dude in the horror movie who just had most of his legs eaten away by zombies.

First off…does ANYONE out there actually worship a monkey god? Second…no, you don’t get to call them worshippers of a monkey god then let yourself off the hook by putting the impetus on your reader if they believe that to be the case. Grow a spine, you fucking cunt, and at least stand behind your insane rhetoric. Thank you for indicating to any one reading this (and in possession of a working brain…and not holding a jug of moonshine) just how great of an ‘intellectual’ (and godDAMN do I use that word lightly) coward you truly are.

Mark wasn’t done, by the way…he added this wonderful little paragraph at the end.

In the meantime I have a wonderful idea along the same lines as that mosque at Ground Zero thing…  a nice, shiny new U.S. Military Base on the smouldering ruins of Mecca   Hooters in time for Haj (thanks to the MarkTalk reader for that much better suggestion).  Works for me!

Yeah, because that’s the same thing. Mecca’s the holiest place on Earth to Islam. New York is the holiest place on Earth for middle aged whores who treat Sex and the City like their bible and love to spend thousands of dollars on ridiculous shoes. Pretty much equal! And hey, let’s keep smacking down the Middle East with big ‘splosions and such, seein’ they all lookin’ good on them news casts! That hasn’t led to ANY problems at all. And I’m sure you’ll be there, leading the charge to…oh…no? You’ll sit at home in your comfy studio, just another chicken hawk always calling for more troops going to more places while you issue ridiculous screeds like this? Awesome.

So, I can’t help but wonder when Mark will use the same ‘Extremists = Everyone’ agenda on Christianity. Time to paint every Christian as a self aggrandizing douche bag gay hater, right? After all, the Westboro Baptist Church are purportedly Christians, so by Mark’s way of reasoning (HA! Almost typed ‘thinking’ in there…HA!) every single Christian out there MUST be of the same ilk, right? Oh wait…no, those are white people. They can’t possibly be wrong.

It’s a bird, it’s a plane, it’s…

Oh.

Yeah, not so much with the Superman thing, though you’d wonder with the way the press keeps clamouring about ‘Obama’s visiting the scene of the disaster!’. What, because only NOW will it be taken seriously?

“You know, this really is pretty bad. When they talked about a portal to Hell opening in this town, I expected a few demons running around and some bad metal music. There is an actual chasm ripped through the center of town, and…is that Satan giving me the finger?”

Why is it so fucking important for the President himself to be there? I have never understood this. I don’t care who you are, I think you can pretty much understand the situation when a disaster occurs…it’s bad. The fucking guy doesn’t need to fly there to know that. It doesn’t do anything but give the talking head jackasses on both sides of the great divide (errr…the political divide, not an actual Hell mouth) something to tut tut about.

However, while he can’t mystically clean up the entire spill using his voodoo he no doubt learned in his time growing up in Kenya, along with Marxism and plotting the overthrow of the West with his Muslim ideals (did I hit all of the ridiculous wackjob talking points? If I’ve missed any, please let me know), he also HASN’T really done a whole lot. The government has basically left the cleanup in the hands of BP. You know, the same BP who didn’t really care to read all of their safety reports and didn’t seem all that concerned with the fact that in the hours before the rig exploding, things weren’t exactly going well.

So, the company that now has a vested financial interest in trying to limit their own liability and that is consistently trying to lower the reality of the problem, and is more than likely crafting it’s strategies to deal with said problem to match, is being allowed to run the show. Yes, THAT makes brilliant fucking sense. Christ, yesterday they stopped that whole Top Kill thing (and lemme tell ya, there is NOTHING as riveting as the live feed from this motherfucker! Every now and then, you see a robot arm. Aside from that…plumes. Sometimes they gradually change color a bit. What ANY of it means I have no goddamn idea. Why was it so important for everyone to be able to watch this with absolutely no context what any of it means?)…for 16 hours, they stopped pumping mud in to the pipe. They didn’t bother to tell anyone. The Coast Guard Admiral supposedly running the show wasn’t informed. Nobody was.

And in the aftermath of that revelation (and their finally admitting that there MIGHT be more than 5,000 barrels a day flowing out in to the Gulf), some moron executive makes some milquetoast statement about how they need to find someone to keep people better informed. According to their website, BP employs more than 83,000 people. You’re telling me you couldn’t find A SINGLE PERSON on your payroll who could call someone up for 2 minutes and tell em what’s up? I don’t fucking care if it’s Pipeyard Joe with the limp…I’m pretty sure the bastard can operate a fucking phone!

Should the Government take over the entire operation? No. Let’s face it, as woefully unprepared as they obviously are, BP still has more expertise here than any governmental agency. They should still be running the actual operation. What I want to see the government actually step up and do is walk up on some BP executive, smack him in the mouth and tell them that they had their chance to be ‘in charge’ and they failed miserably. And if they don’t start keeping the government and public informed about what’s going on, and trying to be something resembling honest with their asinine estimates, it’s fine time.

And maybe we could drop Rush Limbaugh and Michael Moore in to the Gulf. Oh, it wouldn’t help with the spill, but it would be deeply satisfying. Actually…hmmm…how much pressure would we need to pump those two down the pipe…?

I really don’t know quite how to end this…stupid rants that just come to an abrupt halt…but it would certainly be nice if it looked like anyone aside from the people affected were taking this seriously. Sure, BP cares…so much as it affects their financial bottom line and their stock price. The government apparently cares, though only to berate one another over how little they’re doing apparently (here’s the answer folks, YOU ALL FUCKING SUCK. There haven’t been signs that ANY of you pigs has tried to change or do ANYTHING that might either help this time, or try to prevent something similar from going as badly down the line, so you can ALL shut the fuck up). And…yeah. The entire thing is just another depressing glimpse in to how pitifully unprepared we really are to deal with ANYTHING. We talk and talk about how technologically advanced we are, but in the end what does it really matter? When a bunch of long dead dinosaurs can essentially rise up in zombie goo form and destroy this much and all we can do is sit back and talk, we may as well be living in caves.

No, this has nothing to do with some new Guns n’ Roses album…though the quality of the last one was scattershot enough that it might qualify as a pollutant of some sort…

Lots of major companies and industries are shifting their base of production from the West to the East, namely China. The reasons are many.

They can pay virtual slave labour over there peanuts (perhaps literally) and don’t have to worry about those pesky ‘safety’ requirements so long as the Chinese government is getting a healthy portion of the profit pie. They can then ship a bunch of lead-infected crap back to us, where we’ll buy it for next to nothing, all the while funding the companies undermining the economies from our own countries as we help subsidize these corporations shifting more jobs over there (and their ‘supposed ‘headquarters’ in to tax shelters in other countries).

One of the other pesky little regulations that the Chinese don’t exactly have going on is pollution standards. They pretty much don’t give a fuck, just keep the gravy train rolling in to the station on time.

Anyway, they’re typically able to clamp down on any sort of real information about a lot of the issues within their borders coming out, including the truth about the pollution situation. Sometimes things slip through. Good.

Welcome to some photographic evidence of the cluster fuck going on in China. I’m sure they’re just LOVING the fact that all of us over here can’t get enough of those 3 dollar plastic shoes at Wal Mart. Pretty horrifying stuff. Sewage pipes flowing directly in to rivers and the ocean. So much shit being shot in to the air that villagers wear hoods all the time to keep it from falling all over their skin. Chemical wastewater pouring straight in to the Yangtze. Massive festering sores. Cancer rates through the roof. Children with obscenely malformed limbs.

We’re losing jobs by the thousands. They’re losing lives by the thousands. How exactly are we all supposedly benefiting from this shit again? Aaaah, free trade and globalization…what a wonder.

Apparently, the entire thing attempts to put us in lockstep with the ridiculous DMCA laws the US passed a little over a decade ago. Hell, this snippet of the associated article in The National Post should sort of get across how fucked up this incoming piece of legislation is :

Alberta suspects the free-wheeling entrepreneurial nature of its junior energy companies might not fit with staid Bay Street rule-making. Quebec thinks its homegrown enterprise will have trouble meshing with the rest of Canada, fretting the clout it has accumulated with Montreal as master of its securities domain will suffer if the watchdog is chained to Toronto.

Alberta and Quebec are in agreement that something sucks? That should kind of set off a few alarm bells. The fact that the hicks and the frogs are aligned on ANYTHING should have people running in absolute terror from whatever that anything might turn out to be. It HAS to be terrible.

Then we have this article today on the CBC News site.

The new bill, which the government has confirmed will be tabled soon, will aim to provide a much-needed update to Canadian copyright for the digital age. While Heritage Minister James Moore has been tight-lipped on what the bill will contain, leaks have indicated that it will put forward tough anti-circumvention provisions, or rules that will prevent people from breaking the digital locks placed on electronic devices and content.

Oh, that’s just wonderful. “Thanks for buying that CD…oh, did you copy that to your computer? Here’s a nice fine.” That makes perfect fucking sense. So we’re streamlining the whole of copyright law by putting in whatever provisions music labels and music studios, backwards idiots trying to run a fucking business model stuck in 1985, want. Awesome. Hey, Michael J. Fox didn’t have Parkinson’s induced shakes in 1985…does that mean we should let him hold a vial of nitro glycerine now?

And then there’s this genius. Barry Sookman is an IP lawyer in Toronto.

Sookman says that just because a consumer can technically copy content, they don’t necessarily get the right to do so when buying it, the same way that purchasing a hard copy of a book doesn’t give a person the right to steal the audio or e-book version.

“Just because you can do it doesn’t mean you’ve paid the economic right to do it,” he says. “There’s a separate amount that needs to be paid in order to do it.”

Good point, Barry. After all, it isn’t like a levy is charged every single time we purchase any form of blank media that MIGHT be used to make a copy of something. Oh…oh wait…there IS such a levy? Wow, that sort of demolishes his whole pathetic argument then, doesn’t it, since a separate amount HAS been paid in order to do allow for said copying?

So, we’re being charged a tax every time we buy blank media to cover the ‘associated costs’ of copying (because every single time you copy music or a movie that OBVIOUSLY represents a lost sale), even if that’s not what we’re planning to use that media for. And yet yahoos like this vapid tool then want to complain that no payment has been made to allow such a copy. Does this perhaps begin to make sense if you’ve been drinking?

Frankly, by putting in that levy, the associated industries have basically said “Okay, we all know you guys are going to copy shit. We’ll get a little money from the material you’re copying it on to, you copy, it’s all good.” Now they want copying rights removed…yet I somehow don’t see the levy going away. Nope, in fact I suspect that bad boy will be extended to cover things like mp3 players and DVRs. Hell, some broadcasters have started saying they want some sort of levy placed on DVR purchases to cover the fact that people use them to record television and watch programs when they want to. See, this means nobody watches the ads. If nobody watches the ads, the advertisers start demanding cheaper ad rates. Then the station loses money. Soon, the poor station executive is left living in an abandoned fridge box behind a DQ, sucking cock all afternoon for sufficient money to buy enough heroin to make the pain of his existence go away.

The thing is…the people using the DVR that way are ALREADY paying the TV companies when they pay their fucking cable bill. So now you want to double bill people for doing the TV on Demand thing…all the while expanding your own TV on Demand services on your own web sites for free? How much blow have you idiots been doing all these years?!

If there was ANY sort of consistency here it might resemble a sensible plan. Want a levy? Fine…keep it reasonable and extend it to cover digital devices. There. Now you’re covered for your ‘losses’, and so long as it’s kept at a sane price nobody will give a fuck. But no, they ALSO want to charge those device users extra, all the while OFFERING THE SAME CONTENT ON DEMAND FOR FREE ONLINE. You people make no goddamn sense! Do you honestly come up with these concepts by pulling random ideas out of a hat? Do you ask the homeless guy living in the alley for his ideas on how to ‘fix’ things before handing him a fiver and putting your dick in his toothless mouth?

This is the kind of shit that drives me up the wall. The brainless jackasses running their networks and labels with business concepts steeped in the past have their campaign contributing tongues so far up the government sugar hole that specious, senseless bullshit like this has a pretty good chance of being passed. And I can’t WAIT to see what their explanations are when none of this shit makes a damn bit of difference…”We now KNOW that the Canadian public has been using alien technology to steal our profits. It’s the only way to explain why people don’t want to watch our shitty sit coms and 372 medical dramas on a nightly basis!” Then we’ll all be charged a flying saucer levy to build missile defence turrets near the network satellite relays to keep them there space men from stealing the signals.

Or they’ll just blame the damn Mexicans. Seems to work South of the border!

Meet Gabriella Nagy. Gabby’s husband bundled up the kids and left her a few years ago. Why would he do that? Well, he looked at the phone bill and saw that Gabby had a cell phone in her maiden name, with a lot of hour long calls to one strange number. He called that number. The dude on the other end told him that “Oh yeah, Gabby and I have been fucking for 3 weeks.”

Gabriella admits to the affair. So, how does this genius respond? Does she admit responsibility for the whole thing? Does she even admit to a mistake?

Oh no, none of that here! This moron SUES ROGERS for ruining her marriage. Yes, it’s all the fault of the fucking phone provider that this chick spent 3 weeks getting cock slammed by some other guy.

Specifically, she’s blaming Rogers for consolidating her bill (which had been separate) on to the family Rogers bill, which is how the husband saw the phone charges. Did they screw up? Quite possibly, yes.

HOWEVER, the fact that this ditzy spunk repository is now blaming her marriage ending, and her losing her job due to her emotional breakdown afterwards, on the phone company is LUDICROUS. YOU chose to start banging someone else, NOT the phone company. YOU chose to try to keep the affair going, using a hidden cell phone account to do so, NOT the phone company. YOUR actions are 100% to blame for what happened to your marriage.

Shut up, grow up, and take some responsibility for YOU ruining your marriage, you selfish pig. Of course, if she loses the case and has to pay the court costs of both parties, I assume that she will immediately choose another target to take the brunt of blame for her own stupidity. Perhaps a random name chosen from the phone book might be a nice option.

Ugh.

I want to kill them. All of them. Messily. Perhaps with a lawnmower, Dead Alive style.

Oh, did I forget to mention that the preceding video is violent? Too bad. If you see a video after a line talking about killing with a lawnmower, Dead Alive style and are then surprised the video to follow is violent, fuck you too.

Oh, and incidentally, the actual scene in the movie goes on for so long that it manages to become quite boring. Really.

Anyway, yeah, fanboi types, lawnmower, fleshy squishy crunching noises and their death. Sounds like a good fucking evening of fun to me.

Now, they’ve always been around…what’s brought them out of the woodwork lately? Why the good folks at Ubisoft and their latest DRM plan that requires a permanent Internet connection 100% of the time when playing any of their upcoming games. Lose your connection? Too bad for you. Servers down? Too bad for you. It’s truly ASTOUNDING that an idea this bad originated in Quebec.

Yes, it sucks. That isn’t enough for PC fanboi types, though. No, these irrational jagoffs, constructed from the contents of hospital colostomy bags no doubt, are comparing this to rape. Yes indeed, rape. Brutal and unwanted sexual assault (…was the use of ‘unwanted’ really necessary in that sentence?) compares dead even to requiring constant server access to play a game. If you have ever honestly made this comparison, may you be ravaged by the entire populace of Lompoc penitentiary.

Then we have this exchange with a fellow forum user on Good Old Games. First is me, agreeing with the guy above (I would quote him but he just says the same thing and takes longer…and he isn’t me. Let him glorify himself on his own blog, goddammit!) :

Exactly. You want to send a message? Don’t buy it. Let’s just stop acting like computer games are some intrinsic right, or necessary to enjoyment of life.

And the response :

Oh, but they are. Entertaintment is an intrinsic right. Just like broadband internet access. They recognized that over in Finland.

Drink that genius in. Shit, we’re gonna need FEMA to run over to this poor motherfucker’s house and hook his ass up with some DRM-free Assassin’s Creed II, STAT!

ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME. Entertainment is an intrinsic right…right up their with Freedom of Speech and, you know, access to water?! If this is the sort of drivel that will regularly be flowing from it, SHUT YOUR FUCKING MOUTH. NEVER open it again. EVER. Under any circumstances. Have a cold and your nose is stuffed up? Suffocate. Good fucking riddance.

Can we PLEASE stop with the ridiculous fucking comparisons and bleating bullshit about ‘our plight’? And if we can’t get these rejected shit samples to just shut the fuck up, can we perhaps start sacrificing them to Tilikum, the serial killing whale?

You don’t like the new system? Don’t buy it. Play something else. Just stop whining like a spineless fairy about how your ‘rights’ have been exploited you fucking stain. The world should issue rewards for worthless shit like this being stomped from the gene pool.