Peer Pressure Works!

Aaron Rodgers knows who the fuckin’ man is…namely, ME. And since he’s the Captain of the Northern Horde, CHAMPIONS of the Pigskin Idiots league, you all best recognize!

It was actually a REALLY close game. I ended up winning by a final score of 241.34 – 238.78. Yes, that’s insanely close. It all came down to the Monday nighter and whose Minnesota Viking would play better…luckily for me, Sidney Rice out performed Chad Greenway, and the title was wrapped up.

So the year comes to a close…with a mo’fuckin’ championship!

Sadly, in the Matrix Games league where the Horde made the final, I lost by 4 points. If Eli Manning had not been a piece of shit, and if Marques Colston had turned in POSITIVE POINTS on the fucking day, I’d be singing the praises of another free game. I now hate Marques Colston.

If you have watched The League, you understand that reference. If you haven’t watched The League, go download the fucking show NOW. There’s one season, 6 episodes. Funny, funny stuff.

Yes indeed, the league that I set up this year has reached the championship game…and by some miracle, I’m actually in it! Actually, after a very up and down season where almost everyone had a shot at the final playoff spots in the last week of the ‘regular season’, the playoffs have been relatively predictable. I was the 2nd seed overall, and I’m facing the #1 seed in the title matchup.

Currently, I’m favoured by Yahoo to win by a whopping 6 points. So yeah, this looks close. The President has a roster filled with guys like Miles Austin and Jerome Harrison. They’ll either produce a total of 3 points, or they’ll each score 95, and there’s no middle ground. It’s gonna be close!

It has been an enjoyable year, and if people are interested in coming back next year, I’d be down. And this time I will consult a fucking calendar and NOT book the draft to happen during August long weekend. Yes, I was that dumb. And yes, I just assumed I knew which weekend was the long weekend…and I guessed wrong…at 3:30 in the morning. Not a good call on my part.

As for my team overall, my MVP is clear…Aaron Rodgers, my quarterback. He continues to slowly degrade the memory of Brett Favre in the hearts of Packers fans, and produced all season long. Great year.

As for my LVP…hmmm…I’ve cut A LOT of guys who were underachieving, so I don’t have many of them left. So that leaves my first round pick…LaDainian Tomlinson. I thought he had one more year in him. He’s averaging 3 yards a carry. He didn’t.

Surprise guy…there are A LOT I could choose from here. In the end, it comes down to Sidney Rice of the Vikings, who has become a legit #1 wide receiver and Ricky Williams, who rode an injury to his backfield mate to a return to glory. Also, a shout out to the Giants Steve Smith for being the most productive wide receiver named Steve Smith this year…and no, that wasn’t expected.

Bring on the title, motherfuckers!

Yes indeed, time has flown. The Horde have jumped to a 3-1 record and second place in the Pigskin Idiots league. Sean and Liam, meanwhile, battle for last with Party at Schank’s. Let me describe the owner of PaS…he just released Donovan McNabb, starting quarterback of the Philadelphia Eagles,  for Jacoby Jones, third receiver for the Houston Texans. This is like releasing an All Star to pick up a bag of warm crap. The best part…I was considering trading one of my actually decent wide outs to him for McNabb as an insurance policy in case Aaron Rodgers (my starting QB) eventually gets hurt from being sacked 377 times a week behind Green Bay’s truly offensive line.

This week is looking a bit…meh. I’m so thin at running back I just reacquired Jamal Lewis, who is a great back…in 2005. Luckily, I only had to release a spare linebacker to get him. I had a few of those since I had to make some emergency moves last week with half my defense on a Bye week. Let’s hear it for future planning or a distinct lack of it! Yeah! As of now, I’m a 40 point underdog. That doesn’t really bode well.

On another fantasy sports note that also lets me involve my geektastic games addiction, I won one of the Matrix Games Fantasy Baseball leagues (by a single RBI over the course of a 2 week final!), earning me a free Matrix title. My choice…Crown of Glory : Emperor’s Edition. I will take ownership of said game either Monday or Tuesday. Much woohooness!

And I know that I’ve made a few little hints about goings on at Reclaim Your Game and big projects I’ve been involved with on that site. I WILL finally get in to some of that. I’ll wait until it’s not 5 o’clock in the morning, though.

So, I sorta forgot to even talk about Week 1…yay for me being a dumbass. I’m 1-0, but it was an ugly, ugly win. And week 2…

Basically, I’m fucked.

My top pick, running back LT, is out. My #3 wide receiver, Anthony Gonzalez, might be out for half the damn season. One of my better linebackers, Jerod Mayo, is on crutches and in a knee brace. After one fucking week this team is torn to shit!

Okay, I’m flat out dropping Gonzalez, and I’ll replace him with Washington’s Antwaan Randle-El. He’s back in the slot where he’s always been productive, had a great game last week, and his team is playing the Rams…I could put up 6 catches and 80 yards on the Rams this year.

Even though Jamal Lewis is banged up, I’m elevating him to the starting line-up as his team faces Denver. The Broncos are to run defense what government is to good fiscal sense.

On defense it’s goodbye Mr. Mayo and hello to Curtis Lofton of the Atlanta Falcons. He’s a good, tough play maker who did a great job for me when I grabbed him last year.

I’ll get more in detail about the line-up I’ll be using tomorrow, but at least I’ve got some band-aids in place now.

I drafted 6th. I put the goddamn league together, and I get stuck picking in the middle (which sucks). Not cool. And frigging Liam went first…enjoy The purple clad boom or bust warrior, you bastard!

Without further ado, the team (and this is the team I’ll be blathering about on a weekly basis)

Quarterback : Hello, Aaron Rodgers of the Packers. Coming off a stellar year, he should be capable of repeating those stats this year.

I waited a LOOOONG time to pick a backup, and eventually went with Trent Edwards of Buffalo. Not a bad choice, I think, considering he has a fair amount of talent around him. My worry is his line. (continue reading…)

Draft day number 2, which is the only reason I was up and about and somewhat functional at 8:30 on a Saturday.

Bit of a different league structure this time. One an 8 team league, so that’s going to compress the talent with fewer teams to spread it out. And an…interesting league set up. The weekly lineup every week :

QB, QB, WR, WR, WR, RB, RB, WE-TE, WR-RB, WR-RB-TE-QB, K, K, Def, Def

Yep, there are THREE multiple position spots, one at which a QB can be played…on top of having to start 2 of them every week as it is. Couple that with a scoring system where a TD pass is worth as much as a TD scored and it’s passer fever! Oh, and two kickers ever week blows goats…goats with AIDS.

(continue reading…)

Yes indeed, it’s that time of the year…the time when my rampant posts about gaming (my first post about my second try of Arma 2 is coming soon!) become mixed with rampant posts about football teams that don’t technically exist outside of the Yahoo realm.

As I await the draft of the league I set up this year, Pigskin Idiots (featuring a lot of people from a sports site I frequent as well as Liam and Sean Woods…also, incidentally, the league I will be regularly posting about this year), I figured I’d mention how my drafts leading up to that one are going.

Anyway, this is a league using individual defensive players, and focusing in more on position-specific defensive players. Most ‘cookie cutter standard’ leagues (read : boring as fuck) just use team defenses. The weekly line up requirements : 1 QB, 2 RB, 3 WR, 1 WR/RB, 1 WR/RB/TE, 1 K, 1 D (any defensive position), 1 LB, 1 DL, 1 DT, 1 DE, 1 DB, 1 S, 1CB.

(continue reading…)

So, this weekend I have a Fantasy Football draft. Yes, it’s STUPIDLY early…frigging training camp hasn’t even started yet, but we’re gonna draft?!?! No, nobody will get screwed by injuries before the season even starts! Makes PERFECT sense…if you strap on a tin foil hat in the morning before hopping on the short bus.

Anyway, I’ve been doing a few ten team mock drafts just to get the brain cranked up for judging others. Well, my brain is ALWAYS amped for judgment, but not for CONSTRUCTIVE judgment of athletes. So, yes, mock drafts…basically, you join with a bunch of other people and do a fake draft to practice for your real draft…which is also fake. Truly, if you find yourself regularly participating in mock drafts, rest assured that you have achieved a special level of loserdom.

And the PINNACLE of loserdom in this whole thing…trash talking in a fucking mock draft. I don’t know who these dickless retards are but it might be the most goddamn pathetic thing that I have ever seen. What the Hell are you talking smack over?! You’re literally trash talking for outdoing others AT LITERALLY NOTHING. I have seen the following things spoken…

“My team TOTALLY kicks all your asses!”

“HA! My pick RULEZ!”

“I win!”

Yes indeed, you are all victors in picking a team that will VANISH AS SOON AS YOU CLOSE THE DRAFT WINDOW, YOU STUPID MOTHERFUCKERS! Please begin dining on ground glass. You can stop when you start bleeding massively.

Well, it’s over. A 16 point loss has ended the season of the Horde. Sure, there’s the 3rd place game this weekend, but I really just don’t give a shit. Who cares about 3rd or 4th place? It’s not like there are fucking medals for anything but the win, so it’s just pointless. If I’m not first, it doesn’t matter.

REALLY close game, and seeing as the Horde scored about 580 points, I really can’t fault anybody. Sure, there were a couple of disappointing performances, but it was a good effort all around and it was close, so I just can’t work myself up in to any sort of indignant rage over it.

I figure I’ll do kind of a quick season wrap-up and get that over with, then just forget about this total disaster of a stretch drive… (continue reading…)

It’s Week 2 of the playoffs, first game for the Horde. The match-up is with the Zoidbergs. They’re the #6 seed, and upset the #3 Arlington Atomics last week.

QB – With Ben facing the Ravens, it’s all about the Asswipe this week, as he faces the St. Peters Varsity, also known as the Kansas City Chiefs. Zoidbergs has MVP front runner Kurt Warner facing Minnesota, who I hope rag doll him so hard his wife dies. Even (though if she does die, we’re all winners).

RB – This is a little dicey, because several guys are questionable this week. First off, the miraculously NOT injured Steven Jackson. He played well last week, and against the equally ghastly Seattle Seahawks he might actually get a full workload. Washington’s Clinton Portis is also in. I kinda like the fact he lipped off his coach, because he has to prove himself again this week. I also like that he’s playing the St. Mary’s Junior Varsity, also known as the Cincinnati Bengals. For the W/R position, IF Joseph Addai is good to go he plays, because they’re up against the Meredith Heights Pop Warner Also Rans, also known as the Detroit Lions. Otherwise, wideout DaVone Bess is probably slotting in there against the Niners.

Against that, Zoidbergs has Brian Westbrook primed to carve through the Browns defense as easily as a knife through Jon Benet Ramsey (whoa! Classic bad taste!). Detroit’s Kevin Smith should do decently against the Colts. Oddly, he has Arizona’s Tim Hightower against the Vikings, who are as easy to run against as Rosie O’Donnell is easy to stomach. IF Addai plays, advantage me on the basis of that final matchup.

Receiver – Zack Miller gets in the game against New England. Out wide, Moss is in against the Bengals, Brandon Marshall vs. Carolina and Vincent Jackson vs. KC. As already stated, if Addai can’t go, it’s DaVone Bess vs. Miami. If he CAN go, I actually might replace Marshall with Bess…we’ll see. He has Philly’s DeSean Jackson (Cleveland), Minnesota’s Bernard Berrian (Arizona) and the Saints Marques Colston, who already ripped the pathetic Bears Pass D for 44. At tight end, it’s Seattle’s John Carlson (St. Louis). Slight advantage me.

K – Matt Prater stays busy for Denver against the Panthers. For my opponent, San Diego’s Nate Kaeding should put up serious numbers against KC. Advantage Zoids.

Def – DJ Williams might play, but he’ll probably rotate in and out all game, so I’m keeping him on the bench. That leaves the usual crew. I see some opportunities for some serious smash mouth, smack down football games, which I’m hoping equals good numbers. Zoids has already HAD two guys go, and they put up 66. He also has some smash-mouth match-ups, though one of them, London Fletcher, is a game time decision. Slight advantage me.

Yahoo has him favored by 38. He’s also leading by 108. That doesn’t bode well. The way this time took it in the ass down the stretch, I’m not exactly feeling much in the way of faith that they’ll step it up now. I HOPE they do, but I don’t expect it whatsoever.