We’ve recently gone through a bit of a hiring spree at work. It was necessary, and the added help is much appreciated. But as new people come in, they have to be taught how to do things. They also have to keep borrowing my stuff. Because the company doesn’t have any tape measures…none. Every damn thing that we bring in has to be measured, but they have ZERO tape measures for new hires? Seriously?

Now, this is one area where my week of light duties was actually beneficial. My normal instinct is “That needs to be done…I’ll do it immediately!”, but I couldn’t. I had no choice but to call someone else over and tell them how to do what needed doing. I actually don’t mind teaching people how to do something (with one BIG caveat*), I just find it incredibly difficult not to immediately do whatever needs to be completed.

Top of the teaching heap has been ‘How to use a forklift’. It’s been awhile since I’ve had to go through the process of teaching someone how to drive one, but it’s almost nice to see that the same issues exist that did the last time. No understanding of how that pesky tilt thing works. Always driving all the way in to the load, even if it’s so narrow that 3 feet of forks are now jutting out the far side of the skid. Massive over steering all the time. Ah, the classics.

But today ended pretty awesomely. One guy successfully pushed a 190 cm. long crate out the door, swung around to the side, picked it up and loaded it on a flat deck. The other managed to puzzle out how to pull a flat (as in, no skid under it) bundle of plywood weighing over 1,000 kg. off of a truck using some 2×4’s. They grow up so fast! I still took over when it was time to unload 4 28 foot long steel beams weighing over 600 kg. apiece. They were so goddamn long they had to be lifted up and over the fence, because they wouldn’t fit through the side gate. I’m not about to put that on someone who has been driving a forklift for less than 2 weeks.

Originally, they weren’t supposed to do anything on a lift until they’d done the internal ‘forklift test’ whatever it is. I also have to do this, despite being provincially licensed to drive the damn things. Everyone has to. Because some genius on the other side tried to lift something weighing over 8,000 kg. with a small forklift whose lift capacity is several thousand less than that. It tipped forward, he dropped the load, the load fell over. This is the same kid who will burst in to song with no warning, singing in a horribly piercing falsetto. And who keeps referring to himself as a smart kid. He isn’t being ironic. I’m not sad that he works on the other side of the business. Luckily, the powers that be relented when those of us still allowed to drive them pointed out that we’d pretty much be doing nothing else. And the results have been pretty cool. I like teaching someone how to do something!

*Oh yes, that caveat. Nothing pisses me off faster than someone who doesn’t learn because they either can’t be bothered to pay attention or are as lazy as fuck. One of the noobs is skirting that line. I may have to cut a bitch. I REALLY hope he smartens up real quick, because my patience for teaching the same thing ad nauseam is not exactly substantial.

Oh, another forklift story! Ever had someone tell you to not drive over plastic wrap lying on the floor? I have. And ignored them. For years. One of the other guys working airside did that a couple of days ago. It sucked up in to his engine compartment and snapped the fan belt. I have never actually seen this happen before. So there ya go, there IS a reason not to drive over that stuff!