Peer Pressure Works!

Jesus…having just finished my second draft of the day, and having spent the past…4 goddamn hours involved in Fantasy Football drafts, I can honestly say I’m pretty much done in terms of that…and luckily, I AM done in terms of that!

Anyway, The Northern Horde logged in to their draft 7 minutes prior to find…we pick NINTH? Ninth out of twelve teams? Uhhh…wow…did I have sex with the cyborg woman of the Yahoo randomizer or something? On the good side…it is a little nice being on an end of a serpentine draft, since I’ll always have picks 6 apart. On the bad side…it’s NINTH. It’s like…okay, you meet Steven Hawking. Now, you can be at the head end, where you get to talk to a complete genius. Or, you can be at the tail end, where you can observe the expansion of the genius’s colostomy bag. I feel like the Olympian who tripped over the first damn hurdle in the event. This sucks. One note, though…even though 3 of the positions are labelled as defensive linemen, in fact every true lineman AND every linebacker in the league has drawn that title, so ‘backers will be a big part of the league. This makes things a bit easier.

And we’re off! LT goes first…everyone jokes that they’re amazed, because everyone is tired/hungover/on their second draft of the day/obligated to join in by the FF gods themselves. #2 is…Tom Brady? Wow, someone expects 50 TD passes again, apparently. Perhaps someone also still believes in Santa, who may or may not bang hot chicks with Brady’s propensity. Let’s face it, the ladies like the dudes with the schwag, and Santa’s traveling with a load of gifts! #3…Addai? Seems a bit early. Moss and Manning go next…insane hopes that Brian Westbrook will freefall begin to germinate in my fevered brain. They are dashed when he goes 7th (Peterson went 6th). Marion Barber goes 8…holy fucking shit, Steven Jackson just fell to number 9 in the damn draft! This is like your grandma giving you a Ferrari at Christmas, instead of socks. I am amazed, and thrilled! (Just to round out the first round…Maurice Jones-Drew was a surprising 10th pick, Frank Gore went 11th, and Tony “Hey, Tom, I can score with hot chicks, too” Romo went 12th.

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So, the Olympic games finished up a few days ago. I dunno, my interest level in them pretty much could be described as ‘nonexistent’. And I think a lot of that has to do with my complete and total lack of regard for the governing body of the Games, the IOC (cue Imperial March).

This is an organization built on corruption, and the awarding of the Games to the highest bidder, not only in terms of ‘mysterious deposits’ ion to the personal bank accounts of IOC officials, but also in to Olympic spending, which has reached ridiculously epic proportions. For fuck’s sake, the previous head of the IOC, Juan Antonio Samaranch, actually INSISTED on being referred to as ‘Excellency’. I actually kinda have to give such an egotistical douche a bit of a tip of the cap for apparently being anointed with 25 pound testicles, especially since such an affliction most likely makes the acquisition of pants a bit of a laborious process. Oh, and HOW did he become head of the IOC? Well, his impeccable credentials included a long stint as Sports Minister under Generalissimo Franco of Spain. You know, the dictator whose attempted coup d’etat in the mid 30’s led to the Spanish Civil War. The guy who, during that war, was heavily backed by the Nazis (really, anytime your main backer is THE NAZIS, you’ve pretty much lost when it comes to people looking back. I don’t care who you are…

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So, this weekend shall be the weekend of football drafts. On Saturday, the ‘other’ Matrix league has its’ draft. This will require me actually being up and at the computer at 9 o’clock in the goddamn morning, a prospect that does not thrill me in the least. However, it DOES answer the question of what would actually compel me to get up early on a weekend. Football geekery. Actually, is that even surprising?

The league which shall be taking up blog space as the weeks go on drafts on Sunday at the more humane time of 11 in the morning. (And, actually, I have a SECOND draft that day at 1 in the afternoon. This is for yet another league I joined up with before Matrix decided to set up theirs this year. That makes 5 FF teams I’ll have. Even I think that’s, frankly, a little sick). (continue reading…)

Woah, what happened? Where’d all the text go? The brilliant, brilliant writing?

Well, the whole reason I was writing about THIS league was that my league from LAST year didn’t seem to be a go, remember? Well…now it is. I’m going to switch my FF reportage over to THAT league, mainly because as it’s a Matrix Games league, the winner gets a game…when there’s something on the line, things get a little more intense (it’s like the difference in going all in on a poker hand in a ‘for fun’ game, and for a $40 pot). Also, Matrix leagues have RIDICULOUSLY high scoring, so you’re almost never out of the game (passing TDs are worth 12 points, rushing TDs 15, receiving TDs 18). This league also has some very, VERY unique lineups, with 2 QBs, 2 Defenses and 2 Kickers in the STARTING lineup, as well as 2 RBs, 3 WRs, 1 TE, and one flex RB/WR spot.

Now, I am also in a SECOND Matrix league this year. Same high scoring, though some really bizarre calculations will be needed (example…pass completions are worth .4 points each). The big deal with THIS league is, rather than taking team defenses, you draft defensive PLAYERS. The lineup in this league is…1 QB, 2 RB, 3 WR, 1 RB/WR, 1 TE, 3 Defsnive Linemen, 3 Defensive Backs, and 2 Defensive players (probably will be linebackers, since solo tackles are 5 goddamn points each).

So, this is where I throw it open to anyone who’s going to be reading this updates on FF…which team should be the one I focus on blathering about? Doesn’t really matter to me, but I leave it open to you.

Team one’s draft is Saturday, Aug 30th, Team two’s is Sunday, Aug 31st. So, I need to know by the 29th, folks.

Why vote in pointless political elections when you can REALLY affect CHANGE.

Kind of an interesting site I’ve come across, here. Basically, you put in the month and day of your birthday, and it lists the #1 song on that day every year it’s been measured.

Here’s my list, as an example…I’ll copy from ‘76 on.

2008 … “I Kissed a Girl” by Katy Perry
2007 … “Hey There Delilah” by Plain White T’s
2006 … “Promiscuous” by Nelly Furtado featuring Timbaland
2005 … “We Belong Together” by Mariah Carey
2004 … “Confessions Part II” by Usher
2003 … “Crazy in Love” by Beyoncé featuring Jay-Z
2002 … “Hot in Herre” by Nelly
2001 … “U Remind Me” by Usher
2000 … “It’s Gonna Be Me” by ‘N Sync

THE 1990s

1999 … “Genie in a Bottle” by Christina Aguilera
1998 … “The Boy Is Mine” by Brandy & Monica
1997 … “I’ll Be Missing You” by Puff Daddy & Faith Evans featuring 112
1996 … “Macarena [Bayside Boys Mix]“ by Los Del Rio
1995 … “Waterfalls” by TLC
1994 … “I Swear” by All-4-One
1993 … “Can’t Help Falling in Love” by UB40
1992 … “Baby Got Back” by Sir Mix-a-Lot
1991 … “(Everything I Do) I Do It for You” by Bryan Adams
1990 … “She Ain’t Worth It” by Glenn Medeiros with Bobby Brown

THE 1980s

1989 … “Toy Soldiers” by Martika
1988 … “Roll with It” by Steve Winwood
1987 … “Shakedown” by Bob Seger
1986 … “Glory of Love” by Peter Cetera
1985 … “Shout” by Tears for Fears
1984 … “When Doves Cry” by Prince
1983 … “Every Breath You Take” by The Police
1982 … “Eye of the Tiger” by Survivor
1981 … “Jessie’s Girl” by Rick Springfield
1980 … “Magic” by Olivia Newton-John

THE 1970s

1979 … “Bad Girls” by Donna Summer
1978 … “Shadow Dancing” by Andy Gibb
1977 … “I Just Want to Be Your Everything” by Andy Gibb
1976 … “Kiss and Say Goodbye” by The Manhattans

I’d never heard of the Manhattans song, but it’s one of those awesome ones with the bass narrative line going “Girl, I know you’ve got to leave me, baby, so come here and let me hold you in my arms just one last time”, so that’s pretty cool. The remainder of the 70[’s were an abomination. The 80’s…look at that fuckin’ run from ‘81-’85! Unfortunately, then we move on from there…sure, I’m proud to have Mix a Lot reppin’ my b-day, but the rest of that…THE MACARENA? A BRANDY chart topper? Christina Aguilera? That fucking Bryan Adams song from Robin Hood!?!!? Puff Daddy’s lone hit (although, it’s creepy that the main sample of that track is from Every Breath You Take…and if you look at 1983…), NELLY, 2 FUCKING USHER SONGS?!

If there is a God, he’s a jerk.

There are 2 reasons for this post to exist.

1. To test the new Press This feature in Wordpress 2.6 (anyone who has Google Reader and has the Note in Reader button, where you can note any page in your G-Reader account? Yeah, this works exactly the same, only it opens up a Wordpress window, and start posting. It’s a very LIMITED setup, but I could see myself using it if I find a really bizarre video, or something, since it does have an embedder in it.

2. To mock foreigners. Stupid foreigners attempting to part me from my money. I am sick and tired of hearing news reports about these con losers where they are described as ‘brilliant con artists’ who swindle people using ‘highly intelligent and realistic scams’. Have you ever actually READ one of the missives from these subhuman mouth breathers? Well, having just popped in to my Yahoo account to adjust my Fantasy Baseball rosters (There are 2 reasons for my Yahoo account’s existence. 1. Fantasy sports. 2. When emailing resumes to prospective employers, it strikes me as a solid idea to not use an email address including the words Crass and Master. Of course, if that same prospective employer were to Google search my name, eventually they would come to this posting, which implies some sort of sodomy in its’ title, and has attacked foreigners, so…really, we’re just breaking even, here), I came across the latest brilliant release by Ali Baba and his 40 Retards. Shall we take a look? (Unfortunately, this isn’t even CLOSE to the most ridiculous one. I got one a few weeks back that was from Robert Mueller, head of the FBI. Apparently, there was a large sum of money sitting in a fraudulent account, and the Feds were totally ready to sweep in and nab the baddies, if only I’d send them a grand to UNLOCK the money for the bad guys…only then could they get em! What, the Federal Government was just plum out of fucking money that day???)

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